Colon Cancer Sucks Ass

Sunday, December 06, 2009

One Hour At A Time

Well, we made it through Thanksgiving. It was every low key. Our son and his family joined us. Each day closer to Christmas seems to get harder. I go Christmas shopping and I see things everywhere that I know Christine would have loved. It took me four days to finish putting up the Christmas tree when I usually do it in hours. The tree is my favorite because we have so many ornaments that were given to us by friends during our travels and from our family. I have always loved decorating the tree because I knew who the ornaments were from and it is always nice to be reminded of them. Christine had not taken any her ornaments that were given to her before she left for California. I put most of them on the tree. Suddenly there just seems to be reminders of her everywhere. We both loved the Christmas season so much. There are days when I ask myself how can she be gone. I miss her so much.

Christine's mom


  • At 2:04 PM, Anonymous Florencia Rueda said…

    Dear Jan,

    I stumbled across this blog in my fit of tears when I googled colon cancer sucks. I lost my best friend Maggie to colon cancer 7 months ago. Today would be her 34th birthday.

    I am deeply sorry for your loss. And I will keep your family in my prayers.

    Florencia Rueda

  • At 5:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I stumbled across your blog and belive me I feel some of your pain. I lost two sisters from cancer within eight months.One seemed more like my mother and she passed last Xmas Eve. We too just went through the motions of Thanksgiving. I wonder sometimes if the pain will ever leave.

  • At 3:42 PM, Anonymous Mandy said…

    There is a poem by Edna St. Vincent Millay that reminds me of the experience of constant reminders...I guess memories do not have a resting place (thank goodness):

    "Time does not bring relief..."

    Time does not bring relief; you all have lied
    Who told me time would ease me of my pain!
    I miss him in the weeping of the rain;
    I want him at the shrinking of the tide;
    The old snows melt from every mountain-side,
    And last year's leaves are smoke in every lane;
    But last year's bitter loving must remain
    Heaped on my heart, and my old thoughts abide!
    There are a hundred places where I fear
    To go,--so with his memory they brim!
    And entering with relief some quiet place
    Where never fell his foot or shone his face
    I say, "There is no memory of him here!"
    And so stand stricken, so remembering him!

  • At 7:56 PM, Blogger Everyday Survivor said…

    "When The right time comes, acceptance will come in and everything will be okay."

    I came across your blog and I felt connected to your daughter. I was 21 when first diagnosed with Colon Cancer Stage III. Had undergone series of surgeries for the past 3 years now and also more than a year on Chemo treatment.

    My prayers for you and your family. I am sure your daughter is on the safest place right now and happy. God Bless!

    - everyday survivor.


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