Colon Cancer Sucks Ass

Monday, October 12, 2009

They say time heals all wounds

I haven't looked at Christine's blog in a while. We are pretty much taking it one day at a time. I have had one session with a grief counselor. She gave me several suggestions that I am considering.

We have heard from so many people. I can't even begin to tell you how wonderful it has been to hear how they met Christine or how they followed her blog or went to classes with her, etc , etc. I know for me, it has helped tremendously. We knew that she had reached out to a lot of people but we had no idea what an impact she had made in people's lives. She had a lot of support from her friends and family. After she passed away, we found out that she had been much sicker for longer than we had realized. She kept some things from us because she worried about us. She knew the cancer had returned long before she told us. In fact, she told her friends while she was in the hospital that she worried about her mom. I told her so many times that I would be okay but it didn't stop her. I guess she just wanted to protect me.

I miss talking to her. We spent a lot of time on the phone. She was my "go to" person. I was always asking her stuff, like how do I do this on the computer or would I like that movie or what is that ingredient? I still think occasionally "I have to remember to tell Christine that" and then it hits me.

The holidays are coming up so quickly. I am rather nervous about that. Christine and I love Christmas. We had already been making plans before she passed away. That might seem a little earlier but not for us. We would start e-mailing each other on January 25 to see who could be the first to say only 11 months till Christmas and this went on every month all year long. I am going to try to follow through with those plans. I guess I have to celebrate for both of us.

Jan

Christine's Mom

7 Comments:

  • At 11:11 PM, Blogger Dustin said…

    So I was just playing around on Google and typed in the search bar, "I hate colon cancer" and your blog came up. Why would I search for that... the obvious reasons... besides having my (check-up) colonoscopy this coming Thursday, my Mom past away six and a half years ago from colon cancer. I read your most recent entry and remembered all those emotions all over again. She was 44 at the time.
    I just wanted to say a quick hello, and let you know someone out there is think of you, and hoping for you.
    Be well,

    Dustin

     
  • At 2:59 AM, Anonymous Roxanne said…

    Hi there! There should be awareness on colon cancer prevention. But we people are stubborn, we abuse ourselves on our food and lifestyle.

     
  • At 8:56 PM, Anonymous Mandy said…

    Hi Jan.
    I so appreciate your thoughts and honesty....I also am happy you are keeping Christy's blog going.

    I knew losing Christy was going to be one of the most difficult in my life, but I had no idea how much her absence would be felt on a daily basis. She was my "go to gal," too. I am so used to telling her everything, and she did the same. I find it hard not knowing what she is doing wherever she is -- I almost beg her to come as a "ghost" and scare the pants off me, just so I can see her again. Is that morbid?

    She was very loved and valued as a friend. You are not alone in your grief. Please take care.

    Love,
    Mandy

     
  • At 11:09 PM, Anonymous Vanessa said…

    I have a friend - still alive, I talked to her about three hours ago and will see her tomorrow - with a terminal brain tumor.
    They're giving her until February.

    I didn't find this blog googling 'cancer' or "i hate cancer' or anything like that. I started because there's someone in Israel sending me drawings (I have my own blog that attracts - obviously - a motley crew), and I was searching his name and one thing led to another and...

    Long story short, I feel your pain.
    I'm living your pain.
    My girl (whose name is startlingly similar) is still alive, but I would welcome any advice or input or "I'm so glad we..." thoughts before there isn't time for such things.

    Thank you.

    Namaste,
    Vanessa
    http://www.wideawakeinwonderland.com

     
  • At 7:46 PM, Blogger Amber said…

    Hi jan,
    I was looking up sites for Cancer Sucks Merchandise and stumbled across this blog. I lost my brother to Colon cancer on July 17th, 2009. He was diagnosed 4 1/2 years prior to that with Stage 4 colon cancer. He went into liver failure at the end. I can relate about the holidays. I keep thinking how just last year he came to visit and we went out to Dallas and had good times. It's going to be hard not having my brother this Christmas.
    I'm so sorry for your loss.
    -amber

     
  • At 3:31 AM, Blogger Sagar said…

    No one knows the exact causes of breast cancer. Doctors often cannot explain why one woman develops breast cancer and another does not. They do know that bumping, bruising, or touching the breast does not cause cancer. And breast cancer is not contagious. You cannot "catch" it from another person.
    jewish women breast cancer

     
  • At 8:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    MY MOM DIED OF COLON CANCER APRIL 28, 2009. ITS AN AWFUL ILLNESS. A WOMAN THAT WAS SO STRONG AND SMART. THE PERSON THAT I ADMIRE MOST. BECAME FRAIL, WEAK AND NEEDED MY CARE. I JUST WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW THAT COLON CANCER IS A SERIUS ILLNESS. TAKE CARE OF UR SELF. I AM STILL DEALING WITH HER LOST. I MISS HER AND LOVE HER. WITH ALL MY HEART.

     

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